Saturday, December 1, 2007

A Year Ago Today...

... I was sitting in the law library trying to study for my four finals when it dawned on me that I might be pregnant. Once the possibility entered my head I couldn't focus enough to study so I went home to take a test. And it was positive! (I had just started my blog and no one read it or knew about it- not even JP- so I wasn't worried about telling the internet world before I told my own husband.) We were so excited that night. We knew we were embarking on a pretty amazing ride- and that most of the time we wouldn't be the ones driving- but we certainly never expected the amazing highs and devastating lows of the past year. He's worth it, a thousand times over, but wow... I wonder if we would have been so eager to start a family if we knew how little control we'd have over our lives from that point forward!

10 comments:

  1. How funny!
    We just found out this morning that we are expecting #2.

    My thoughts are with you through this whole ordeal.

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  2. I'm mostly a lurker, but my heart has been breaking for you and all you've had to endure throughout this ridiculous investigation. But I truly believe that all of this will be over by Christmas time and you will be able to go forward and leave it behind you and enjoy your son. Today we celebrated our daughter's 3rd birthday, and I can say, without a doubt, that it was totally worth it. Every minute. It only gets better. *hugs*

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  3. (((LL))) Aww ll. I'm so sorry you can't be carefree and enjoy Landon as you rightly deserve. It won't be long until this is all gone.

    I've avoided commenting recently but I can Feel so much sadness behind the words of this post that I just had to show support to you.

    Wish I could put a bandaid on this thing for you.

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  4. It is amazing how much your life can change it such a short time. In a year this will all be behind you and you will be back in Texas. Enjoy this 1st year of his life. It goes by so fast.

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  5. Congrats Banana's Momma!

    LL, I know it's hard to get perspective right now but it will get easier. In addition to the hell you're in now, you had colic and reflux and all sorts of horrible things. Tonight Pumpkinhead came up and told me he wants to draw me a dinosaur picture for my birthday and give me one hour of cuddles. :) Life's hard but they definitely, definitely, DEFINITELY make it more worth living. Hopefully once the rest of the world gets out of your tiny family's way, you'll be able to focus more on the everyday joys.

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  6. Oh, LL. I hate DCFS for you. I keep thinking that you're going to be good news -- and I'm confident you *will* eventually -- and I feel your disappointment. It sucks. But, you remain in my thoughts and prayers and I *am* confident you'll get good news. And then you'll be able to look back at Landon's conception and all that came after with a light heart. (Okay, is it bad that I wanted to giggle when I said Landon's conception? I'm officially a 13-year-old boy.)

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  7. Nothing like a missed period to completely derail studying for finals! (My Con Law grade certainly suffered for that one!)

    Being a parent is hard enough, and just reading about the crap you've been put through makes me want to go punch people in the face I've never even met. Hopefully this will all be over soon enough and you can be free to just enjoy being a parent once again!

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  8. I remember running out to buy a pregnancy test and taking it in the CVS bathroom two hours before my Family Law exam after obsessing about it while trying to study. It was positive and somehow I managed to do well on the exam, despite the shock. :)

    Happy conception day, Landon!

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  9. I'm so irked that the joy of the first year with your child has been marred by your undeserved encounters with idiot doctors and evil DCFS bureaucracy. This should have been a wonderful time- but time with Landon will continue to be wonderful, and DCFS will hopefully fade away never to touch you again!
    (and I do mean it about some doctors being idiots- I know a young doctor that refuses to have her 1yr old wear a hat because she read a study that says wearing hats makes them more susceptible to ear-infections. Nevermind that you lose the majority of your bodyheat through your head and her child is constantly sick. I mean we live in Northern Europe- its cold outside!)

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  10. Hi, I've been reading your blog for a while now, and I posted once about 6 weeks ago. While killing time between B-school classes today, I read a few of your older posts, and one in particular "Why Can't I Want Both" really struck me. I'm so glad you've put that in writing! My Org Behavior class has debated this issue often, and no matter what I say, it never resonates with classmates.

    I wish I could make them understand, that yes, being pregnant is something that only a woman can do, but raising a child is not gender-specific. So, on a completely non-investigation related note, I want to give you two thumbs up! I think it will be nice to point out that my MBA is just as valuable to me as my male classmates.

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