Sunday, November 15, 2009

Things, cont.

Once again, a long delay between posts. This situation has devolved from bad to worse and even though I desperately wanted to talk about it, I try to keep this blog about me and not others, a rule I adhere to even more strictly when the person is identifiable. So I drafted several long rants in my head and stayed away from blogger.

The biggest turn of events occurred on Wednesday when JP realized there was no possible way he could continue with the swim school. And more than that, the school was functionally splitting into three parts, each of which would be run by a different person, none of whom are him. I came downstairs after putting Landon to bed and overheard the end of his phone conversation with a person he'd hoped to continue working with. He looked broken. There's just no other word to describe it - until that point, he'd really believed his dream and all his hard work would continue on in some way. And I sat on the floor next to him and cried. For him- for all those late nights, for all the stress of business school and starting a new business, for all the time he gave up with me and Landon, for how much he loved that company and the coaching, and for all that work coming to nothing. And for me- for all those nights and weekend hours on my own, for all nights he tucked me in bed and I fell asleep alone while he worked, and for finally believing in something and having it crushed. He will be fine of course, he'll have an MBA from the University of Texas and an incredible learning experience on his resume, but it still sucks in a huge, heartbreaking way and I'm not done feeling upset about it.

Then I got sick on Thursday and spent 3 hours on Friday waiting for the doctor. I do not have the flu- although I started thinking that if I didn't have it at the time, I probably would soon after spending all that time in a waiting room. I've spent the weekend resting and re-reading the Twilight series. I just finished Breaking Dawn and am disappointed that it didn't improve with time. I'm even more disappointed that I am somehow drawn to the story anyway. Those books are a mystery to me- I loathe them for the bad writing and unforgivably shallow characters (and the creepy, controlling 100-year-old lover of the flat, ambitionless 18-year-old heroine), and yet, I stayed up too late last night finishing Eclipse. I can't explain it. I've never been a fan of daytime soaps or reality tv- maybe that's what these books are to me? Literary brain candy.

Tomorrow is our ultrasound for the first trimester genetic screening. It's much more detailed than the first one, and now that I'm 12-weeks the baby should look more like a person than a tadpole or little dot. It should be very fun to see him or her swimming around in my belly. I still can't quite believe I'm pregnant, I have to keep reminding myself of it. I look the same- I actually lost 5 lbs. in the last week thanks to being sick (don't worry, I'm working on getting it back), and I feel fine. Only the higher level of tiredness and the random distaste for certain foods keeps me aware that there's a baby growing inside me. Tomorrow should be lots of fun- a bright start to a new, hopefully far less eventful week.


  1. Awww, that stinks for JP (and you). I hope he can move past it quickly and have better luck with his next endeavor.

  2. So sorry about JP's business. How disappointing! Poor him, poor you. It just sucks.

    Enjoy the ultrasound tomorrow, though!

  3. ugh, i am really sorry to hear that the swim school didn't work out!

    kudos to you for supporting him. for what it's worth, i admire both of you for giving this a shot. and as a student in the MBA program myself, i am hugely impressed by JP's ability to balance the program and this effort.

    hope the ultrasound goes well :)

  4. I can't believe this about swim school. I'm shocked and angry and I wasn't invested at all. It's funny all I kept thinking is "He should sue!" Which is even funnier because you are a lawyer. But an MBA from UT will def serve him well. And thank you for your comments about Twilight series. I read the first one for a book club and hated it. I finished it but also thought the writing was awful and the characters were lame. Glad to know I'm not the only one.

  5. I'm sorry about the business. That just sucks.

  6. So sorry about the business!

    Regarding Twilight: You are the first person I've found that feels the way I do ( creeped out) about the fact that Edward is 100 and Bella is 18. Really gross when you think about it. But, yet, I still read all those books in record time.

  7. Good thing he went through with his second year of the MBA program. Wasn't he thinking of leaving it due to being busy with the swim school?
    I look forward to hearing about your ultrasound and pregnancy. I was pregnant at the same time you were with Landon. But I'm not pregnant now. Maybe I'll change my mind after reading about it here-? :)

  8. So sorry about the swim school. I would guess this won't be JP's last foray into entrepreneurship. I completely agree with your feelings on starting businesses, although I think are people out there very well suited to it. JP sounds like one of them.

    You summed up my feelings on Twilight exactly. I didn't like it much, but couldn't stop reading it obsessively once I got to Eclipse. My nine year old DD has read them all about 8 times. She's thinks it's the most wonderful piece of literature out there. Luckily getting it out of her system now, hopefully she'll move on to something better. I do have to remember how much time I spent reading VC Andrews back in Jr. High and High School.

    Good luck with the ultrasound.

  9. Hang in there. Apparently the swim school wasn't meant to be. It is very obvious from your writing that your husband is smart and hardworking and not afraid to take risks. This may just be a learning experience for him so that he will know what pitfalls to look for in his next business. It does suck though and you have every reason to be angry. But in the end it sounds like these are not people he should be in business with.

    I hope you get to feeling better soon. Take care of yourself. And the Twilight series is a mystery to me too. I don't know why I like it as I can barely stand to read 90% of it but the other 10% is riveting. If they could just get rid of Bella and the drawn out, over thought teen angst the books could be really good.

  10. Oh no! I know how happy you both were about that opportunity. :( I'm sad for you, too.

  11. Sorry to hear about swim school... that's so tough.

    On Twilight - completely agree. But can't bring myself to buy any of them so have only read the first two.

    Also, we have our first ultrasound tomorrow too - just a dating one though. Good luck!

  12. really relieved to find there are others out there who share my feelings on Twilight