C-Sections and Recovery: 2 Weeks Out

I had my 2 week check-up today with my OB. It's amazing that we only met Cora two weeks ago- she's so loved and such an elemental part of our life and routine already, and the hospital portion of it all seems so far away. But two weeks ago it was! Everything went great- I'm 10 lbs. off my pre-pregnancy weight (maybe a little extra fluid still, but probably mostly extra cookies), my incision looks great, and the check-in nurse verified twice that it wasn't my 6 week check-up. While I was at the OB, JP took Cora across the street for her 2-week newborn screening. I left my doctor in a great mood, but Cora is still pissed about the heel prick. She's frowning in her sleep on JP's chest right now and I think she's having flashbacks.

pre-heel prick; braced for the arctic DFW temps

One of my closest co-workers is pregnant with her first child and was asking me and our other co-worker friend about our experiences with delivery and recovery. I've written each kid's birth story: Landon's (vaginal) is here (recovery post here); Claire's (scheduled c-section due to birth trauma to a preemie Landon from my narrow pelvis) is here (2 weeks out post here); and Cora's (also scheduled c-section) is here. I felt like each was a really good experience. Landon's delivery went very well (for me). While I feel confident that a c-section was the right way for me to go post-Landon, that was to protect the baby, not because I didn't want another vaginal delivery. I'm glad I got to have that experience- the length of it, the intimacy, the feeling of JP and I being in it together in our darkened room overnight, waiting for the contractions to get stronger and our son to be born. A c-section, while still both good experiences for me, is definitely more clinical. It's so quick, in a bright sterile room, and you're physically totally cut off from what's happening below your chest. If the anesthesiologist hadn't told me Cora was about to be born, I would have had no idea. It's fine- c-sections serve an important purpose, and JP (and this time my mom too!) was still right there with me, but it's all a bit surreal. Lay down, go numb, here's your baby! I never gave a lot of thought to how my babies would be born while I was pregnant- it seemed largely out of my control and useless to worry over, and then Landon arrived a month before I might have started to worry about it despite myself, so I didn't have much emotional attachment to one method over the other. While I would have opted for another vaginal delivery after Landon, I didn't mind when it was clear afterward that it would be better that future babies be born by c-section. The c-sections were good experiences too, just very different ones.

As for recovery- at two weeks out, I've found the recovery to be exactly the same. I'm me- I've been off any pain pills for a week, I can move, bend, and generally live the way I normally do. I'm in normal clothes (leggings and a sweater dress- I'm loving fall postpartum), and I feel great. My scar is a little numb, but it's thin and pale and there's no pain or itching or anything else. I still can't exercise, have sex, or lift anything "too heavy" (left to my discretion to decide what that is... Cora and her car seat are not, Claire probably is), but all those restrictions are similar to a vaginal delivery and will go away in another month. The difference for me was the early days- I felt good pretty much immediately after Landon's vaginal delivery, while the c-section sends you a bit deeper down the recovery valley at first. You've had abdominal surgery, the gas pain is worse than the incision pain, you need help getting out of bed- transitioning from sitting to standing is hard and a bit overwhelming, and the nurse's directive to start walking within 24 hours of surgery seems even more so. But I knew from Claire, and I learned again with Cora, everything gets better if you get up and move around. At least once you have the right pain medicine. Once I got off the hydrocodone and on Percocet about 24 hours after surgery, I was back up the upward trajectory (insider tip: you should not feel awful after your epidural or IV is taken out, pain pills can be very effective- if you're dizzy, faint, and in extreme pain when you try to stand up, you're on the wrong medicine; I don't think I would have realized that if I hadn't remembered how much better I felt after having Claire). With the pain pill thing settled, I went home pretty much exactly 48 hours after surgery and felt really good. I moved around slowly and got out of bed and out of chairs even slower (and JP had to help me put on socks, I remember that because my feet were freezing until I tracked him down in the kitchen to do it our first morning home), but I didn't hurt. I could hold and care for Cora, as long as someone was around to pass her to when I needed to transition from standing up or sitting down. That's another thing with a c-section- you're going to need more help. Or even if you don't need it, asking for and using any help offered will help your recovery immensely. I found the recovery slope to rise swiftly- each day was a huge improvement from the one before. My parents left 4 days after Cora was born and while that seemed too soon on day 2 and even day 3 post-surgery, it turned out to be fine. By day 5 I was moving around well (clearly, I ran 3 errands and went out to lunch with my mom that morning) and of course, I still had JP (who was particularly helpful in doing 100% of the care for the bigger children and holding Cora and my hand every time I needed to get out of a chair). Also, coughing, sneezing, or laughing for the first 10 days or so after a c-section is terrifying (sort of like going to the bathroom after a vaginal delivery), but rest assured, none of those things will actually cause your stitches to burst. So, deeper valley (not that vaginal delivery recovery wasn't still a valley; I remember wincing every time I sat down, so kind of the opposite of the post-c-section slow transition to standing up, but other than some tenderness, the way I felt 48 hours post-Landon probably took me 7 or so days to reach post-Claire or Cora), but noticeable improvement every day.

One other thing my co-worker asked about was packing for the hospital. With Landon's surprise birth, I only had what was in my purse and the few electronic items (camera!) I sent JP home to fetch after my water broke downtown. With Claire, I got to plan, but wasn't sure what I'd want to wear post-c-section. So with Cora, I should have been all set, but I couldn't really remember what I felt like immediately post-Claire (thus the memorializing of this post, not that it will help me again) and still wasn't sure what to pack so I threw a bunch of things in a bag to figure out there. Here's what worked for me:

A small bag (we used a backpack) with camera, phone chargers, chap stick, and JP's Economist magazines for him to bring in to the hospital for the surgery, and then a larger bag for all the clothes and toiletries to stay in the car until we were in our real room. In the bigger bag:
- fuzzy socks: preferably with grippers, or a pair of slippers; as mentioned above, you'll be walking around as part of your recovery
- nursing tanks: I like the $15 ones from Target, but there's a whole array of fancier ones to choose from too. I liked wearing these in lieu of a bra because they're soft and comfortable, provided some support for my tummy, and I liked the coverage when unsnapping my gown or sleep shirt to nurse or have my incision checked. Even if I had no intention of breastfeeding, I'd want a few tanks in my bag
- wrap top open sweater, or other cozy thing that is easy to take off and on when cold while sitting
- loose pants: I didn't even wear pants until day 2- the blankets in bed covered my legs just fine and I wore my hospital gown on my first walk (a robe might be nice, but I only own a giant bright red terry cloth one and that was decidedly not coming to the hospital). For pants, I found a lower waist band that was fairly loose and just rested on my bandaging worked well- at first, a higher waist seemed like the answer, but I found with Claire that I didn't like anything pressing on my stomach, and the incision area was actually too numb to be tender, so it worked best for me to have something that lightly rested right about there.
- PJ set: this was a gift to myself this time around and I loved it- loose pants, a nursing tank, and a short robe-like wrap top- perfect to wear while sitting. I got my set from Motherhood (like this, but my set was navy blue and I got another one that was light grey with a polka dotted tank). This is basically all I wore in the hospital and it's what I ended up wearing home too
- chap stick!: my lips get so dry in the hospital, this was the first thing I asked JP to dig out of the backpack and put on my hospital tray table
- face wipes : I loved having these for the first night when I wasn't ready to take a shower but wanted to feel like I did)
- toiletries: toothbrush, toothpaste, lotion, etc. basically whatever you'd pack for a weekend away (and everyone is different, but I loved having my blow dryer, straightener, light makeup etc.- maybe you won't want to mess with it, but I did and it made me feel 300% more human to do so)
- baby clothes: maybe the most important thing, if your baby isn't in the NICU, you get to change their clothes! (We didn't know that until we had Claire.)
- electronics: I loved having my laptop with me, it connected me to the outside world on my own terms (sharing pictures, sending emails, etc.) and I loved being able to go through my pictures right away. I brought my kindle but never touched it- we were in the hospital for such a short amount of time that pictures and a few blog posts were as much entertainment as I needed. You'll also want all your chargers, etc.
- snacks: I've had friends say they were starving right after having a baby. I wasn't with any of the three- actually, my appetite pretty much disappeared for 48 hours with each, but if we'd had snacks, it might have been nice to give the kids when they came to visit after school (they ate my jello instead). Oh, and with Cora they had me on a "light/mostly liquids" diet for the first 12 hours or so. They didn't do that with Claire, but it didn't really matter since I wasn't hungry anyway (just an FYI for other people who might want to smuggle in some crackers or something).

That's about it- really, it's just a weekend away. I never bothered with my own pillow or blankets (or underwear- embrace the mesh!), but if you're in the hospital for 3-5 days as you could be for a c-section, you may want them. This time around I basically wore the matching PJ set (top only for day 1, different top with pants on day 2, and then we were home), fuzzy socks, and chap stick. I played with my camera and laptop and held Cora. It was a pretty brief stay.

That's all I can think of on c-sections. Before I had Cora I went back and read all my June 2010 archives to try to remember what my recovery was like with Claire, but all I remembered was the wonder and joy of Claire and I worried I was glossing over the actual experience. But here I am 2 weeks out with Cora and I'm already mostly only remembering the wonder and joy of Cora. I do very clearly remember taking that first walk on the hydrocodone and feeling like I was going to faint and the ONLY things keeping me upright were my death grip on JP's arm and the knowledge that falling down and being caught by him would hurt my abdomen so badly that I refused to do it. But that was due to bad pain medicine, not the c-section, so I'm not sure it's fair to focus on. I took a walk 3 hours later on Percocet and made a whole loop around the nursery and nurse's station (slooooowly, but not painfully). Pain control is everything- take the drugs, beep your nurse for your next pill 5-10 minutes before you're due for it, and ask every nurse you have for advice on controlling the gas pains (it's hard to describe the gas pain if you haven't had abdominal surgery, it was far more pressing than anything from the incision and it can hurt all the way from the tips of your shoulder blades on down; it is bizarre and as important to control as any other pain). Each nurse had a different suggestion and I found them all helpful (a combo of milk of magnesia and Maalox was particularly helpful the second night).

Cora's birth is probably my happiest birth experience- it was the most clinical (for whatever reason the OR in Austin seemed warmer), but I got to have Cora on me, skin-to-skin, moments after she was born and she stayed there, cozied up on me for hours afterward. I have a hard time putting what that meant to me into words, to have here there, feeling her breathing up and down on my chest, and being able to look at her tiny face, but it was purely and incandescently wonderful. I couldn't stop smiling. I can't stop when I think about it now- it didn't matter that I didn't know the OB, that I was in a sterile OR, or that my body was being stitched back together a few inches south of Cora's warm body. My baby was with me and everything was wonderful. Vaginal or cesarean was irrelevant- that was the experience I wanted to have and I'm so thankful I finally got to have it the third time around.

Mora Cora

We're home! I've just returned from our first walk around the neighborhood (or more accurately, slow shuffle down our street and back), and my parents are continuing on a longer, faster walk with Miss Cora to take advantage of this gorgeous day.

I stayed in the hospital for 3 nights/4 days with Claire, so I was surprised to be offered a chance to go home yesterday, but once I got that switch in narcotics Tuesday afternoon I really was a whole new woman. I was comfortable (with regular doses of medicine), able to walk (albeit slowly), able to get up and down (again, slowly), and generally felt like myself. Cora was doing awesome- she is so unbelievably calm, alert, and sweet, and the thought of a night in my own bed with JP next to me sounded too good to pass up, though we asked for a late afternoon check out to make sure I was doing as well as I thought.

Snuggles yesterday morning

We had a good day- everyone passed all their tests, my incision looked great, and I got visits from some of my favorite co-workers. I continued to walk, eat, and snuggle my baby girl. In the afternoon, when it was clear we were heading out, we got Cora dressed in her going home outfit. I think she felt very snazzy.

 

Then, of course, she had some snuggles.

 

And then, also of course, we waited on hospital paperwork and discharge orders. That was fine, we held Cora some more and I took a series of ridiculous pictures of her yawning. (Sorry Cora, I love a yawning baby.)

 

Then we got all bundled up to go home! My mom left to get Claire at school and Cora and I ended up waiting a bit because JP was stuck at the pool. Then he was here! And we were rolling out.

 

We got home and there was Papa! Landon had been excitedly showing him the ins and outs of his new fort when we pulled up.

 

Both kids were SO excited to have Papa and Gigi AND Cora in the house. There was a lot of bouncing up and down with glee.

 

Both children needed to hold Cora immediately, so we headed to the couch. Tex came too and we had a family picture.

 

Our night went pretty well- Cora woke up more often in her little bassinet (she much prefers to be in someone's arms), but she's eating well (bottles and nursing, we're doing both) and is so sweet. Both kids were thrilled to find her in the house again when they woke up and she got lots of kisses before they went to school.

 

I had wondered before Cora arrived if everything would feel as new the third time around. I knew we'd be thrilled to have her, of course, but would all the steps- the hospital, the going home, the firsts of it all feel as special. And oh yes, yes the do. Because they're Cora's firsts, and that makes them new to us too. We love finding things that are similar to us and Landon and Claire, but there's so much that's unique to her and we love finding those things too. We love everything about her tiny self and we're all just so, so happy she is here.

 

The Last 36 Hours: Birth, Struggle, and Snuggles

Cora is a snuggler. She is tiny, sweet, calm, and very alert, and she is happiest when she is snuggled on someone's chest like a little baby wombat. (Actually, I have no idea if wombats like to snuggle, but it just feels like the right animal analogy.) I took this wombat baby selfie last night after a rough recovery day (for me, Cora's doing great) so I could show my grandma that we're using the blankie she knit for Cora (largely because Claire pulled it out of my bag 3 seconds into her second visit and insisted that Cora needed it on her immediately), and I love the calm reality that it captured.

 

I had only just brushed my hair for the day (it was about 8 p.m.), any vestiges of makeup was whatever was leftover from my Tuesday morning application 36 hours before, and my big goal for the evening was to take a shower and brush my teeth. But my pain was under much better control and Cora was snuggling. Things were, and are, quite excellent. And now, since I seem to have some time (Cora is sleeping happily on my chest again), I'll document the last 36 hours or so and promise to proofread later:

Birth Story

As you could probably tell, Cora patiently waited to meet us until her scheduled arrival date. My mom flew in the night before, we got the kids off to school, I got ready and re-packed my bag and then we just sat around and waited until we could head to the hospital at 11. We went right back to pre-op where I got changed into my hospital gown, said goodbye to my big belly in the mirror, and got into bed. There was lots of waiting punctuated by activity (I got my IV, I got prepped, I got a super fashionable surgical hat) and little meet and greets (my nurse, my anesthesiologist, my OB's partner I'd never met (mine had her baby two days before), my new OB's nurse). We found out at 1 p.m. that the time was officially being pushed back to 2 p.m. I hadn't had anything to eat or drink after midnight and was getting quite thirsty, but the IV helped once it got going. The nurse gave JP his "daddy pack" of surgical scrubs and asked if my mom was going into the OR too. We hadn't known she'd be allowed, and when I asked if she wanted to she said it would be a thrill (I think from both the "see my baby having a baby" and "biology II AP teacher" perspectives :), so she got a daddy pack too!

At 1:45 or so, I was wheeled off to the OR to get my spinal and epidural while my two guests got changed and waited to be brought to me. In the OR, which was supposed to be freezing but felt perfect to me (I had been SO HOT the last two months of my pregnancy, poor JP who is usually a furnace at night would wake shaking from the arctic depths to which I had plunged the room while he was sleeping), was bright and big and full of people. My anesthesiologist was very friendly and good about explaining what was happening. I got my spinal, which always amazes me in its immediate effectiveness- one second you're putting your feet on a bench and bending over, the next you can't even wiggle your toe. I got an epidural as well for post-surgery pain management, was laid back on the bench, got draped, and waited a few minutes for my mom and JP to be brought back while a lot of preparatory activity I couldn't see was happening in my mid-section. I did get a comment from every single person in the room about my prior "you can barely see it!" scar and lots of compliments to my connective tissue and healing abilities. For some reason, this made me think of Wolverine and I felt very fierce. My blood pressure also fell immediately after getting the spinal, just like it did last time (when you start out in the 90/45 range normally, you don't have far to fall before everything goes numb), so I got some medicine that perked it right up (and, as an added plus, gave my vampire pale skin some nice pinkening). It's all about glamour in the OR.

Around 2:00, Mom and JP were in place by my head and everything got started. Being squarely behind the drape, I can't really tell you what all goes on, but according to JP "lots of cutting" and according to my weirdly pain free, but not totally sensation-free mid-section, "lots of tugging." Cora was, of course, in a difficult posterior position high in my rib cage (I knew I couldn't breathe!) so at some point there was a LOT of tugging and I'm pretty sure a nurse jumped on my ribs to push her down. I know that JP kind of jumped back at that and said "holy crap" under his breath, so I guess Cora was pretty stuck. And then the anesthesiologist told me, "In a few seconds, she's going to be born!" And out she came! Quiet at first, then quite mad. I heard the OB remind JP to take pictures and then she held up a very angry, very red little Cora. She looked a little bit like a demon and it made me laugh.

Poor, poor Cora thinks she is having a very bad day

They start stitching me up- I can feel some very light tugging, but no pain- and Cora goes to be weighed and suctioned by her nurse who has been waiting in the room. JP and my mom follow to the other side and let me know the stats- she's 20 inches long, our shortest baby (Landon was 20.5 and Claire was 21) and 7 lbs. 10 oz., a full pound lighter than her same-term big sister! Cora just knows she's still pissed about how her day is going.

 

JP brings her over briefly. I'm so glad my mom got to be in the OR with us and see Cora come into the world, and not just because I got a second photographer to capture moments like JP making our first real introduction:

 

I'm still being put back together, so Cora and JP head back over to the other side of the room for her assessment. I overhear the nurse explain that Cora swallowed a lot of amniotic fluid and isn't clearing it as well as they want so they'll want to keep a close eye on her. I asked the anesthesiologist if I could see her again before they take her (this is what happened to Claire and then she was gone for 3 hours, and of course we only saw Landon for a few seconds after he was born and then not again for about 8 hours) and he said, "Oh, she's not leaving, they'll just watch her here with you." Cora's nurse came over to my head and explained the same, that Cora was retracting and her respirations were a bit too high, and would I be interested in trying some skin-to-skin contact to help calm her down?

Meeting my baby girl

I've never been able to just be with my babies after they were born, so I was very, very happy. I laughed when I saw this picture later because it really does manage to capture my rather incandescent glow in the moment, even as I'm still being stitched up right out of the camera frame.

So, so happy

At some point I was finally put all back together and Cora rode with me, still skin-to-skin on my chest, back to the recovery room. My epidural was in, giving me Demerol every 15 minutes, and I was feeling pretty good. Cora's nurse checked her again after a while and was very pleased with her improvement. I remained delighted with our full contact tummy time. After an hour or so in recovery (maybe more, I really have no idea), we were taken up to our room on the 3rd floor. Cora rode with me again, while my mom and JP trailed behind.

JP left soon after we got settled to pick up the kids from school and bring them over to meet their sister. I was still feeling pretty good, thanks to the lingering effects from the spinal and the new effects of the epidural, and Cora was breathing great and sleeping in my arms after trying a little nursing. Around 5:00, the door opened and two Big and Bigger siblings popped through.

 

Claire climbed on board the bed IMMEDIATELY and Landon paused just long enough to remember that we don't wear shoes on furniture.

They took turns holding their highly anticipated baby Cora and I watched from the bed with the video camera and a big smile.

 

My mom took the very excited siblings home for dinner and bed and Cora got her first real bath (they wait to bathe them here until they're more than 8 hours old, which was nice, they hate it so much and Cora was stressed enough post-birth). Like she's been with everything except her actual eviction, she was calm as can be and her eyes were so big and dark and open.

 

Then I just got to hold her. We checked each other out for nearly an hour. It is such an amazing thing to meet the baby you've been carrying around for 9+ months.

 

And then began a difficult night of not sleeping (constant interruptions, discomfort from having to be on my back, increased gas and abdominal pain, and increased incision pain). The epidural was pulled around 4 a.m. and I was put on hydrocodone. As we found out a few hours later, I do not do well on hydrocodone. Cora spent some time in the nursery so we could try to sleep, but came back about 5:30 when it was clear that wasn't happening. I was forced out of bed to go to the bathroom (the catheter went away with the epidural) and that 4 foot walk left me shaky and in a lot of pain. Things did not much improve from there. My mom forced me on a walk with JP (I was supposed to be walking every 2 hours and had basically sat in bed gritting my teeth for the last several hours) and I was shaky and dizzy and gripping onto his arm for dear life while moving 1/2 mile per hour, hunched over, with sad shuffling steps. I never, ever felt that was after Claire's c-section.

When I got back to the room I was extremely pale (which is saying something, given my normal coloring) and my lips were bluish purple. We paged my nurse, who was utterly unhelpful (the only unhelpful type person we've had so far, but of course, the one I had right then) until my mom basically demanded she call my OB and ask for a different pain medicine for me. I was hurting so bad I genuinely couldn't imagine ever not feeling that way. I couldn't hold Cora and couldn't really move, even though staying still wasn't feeling great either (and was only making the abdominal pain worse by the minute).

And then Percocet came into my life. Within an hour I had my coloring back, within 2 hours my pain was way down, and by 3 I took a slightly faster (maybe 3/4 miles an hour, slightly less shuffling) walk around the hallway. I was a whole new woman!

The kids visited after school and were again very excited to see their sister. Cora was sleeping, so the kids gave her "pets."

 

Claire dug through my bag to find Cora's blankie (lovingly knit by my grandma, just as Claire's are) and insisted that Cora have it on her immediately.

 

The petting and blankie covering did manage to wake up little Cora, so the kids jumped on the couch to take turns holding her again.

Landon is an excellent holder of babies. He loves her so much. Claire needed a water break.

 

Cora checked out her big brother. I think they had a deep and important conversation.

 

And then, in another testament to how much better I was feeling, I got all 3 kids in/around my bed. 3 kids!

 

Cora went to the nursery last night and my nurse barred everyone from my room so we could get some sleep, and we did! And Cora came back to see my about 5:30 a.m. and snuggled with me for a solid 2 hours of intermittent napping. I'm feeling MUCH better and my discharge has been bumped up to this evening. Cora is snuggled in my mom's arms, I'm about to take a shower, and everyone is very happy.

Welcome Little One

There's someone I'd like you to meet:

 

Cora Linnae was born at 2:24 today, 11.12.13, weighing 7 lbs. 10 oz. and measuring 20 inches.

 

She is pink and perfect and wonderful.

 

Everything went great and all I could think when they handed her to me for the first time in the operating room was, "Welcome to the world little one, we are SO excited to meet you."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ready for Takeoff

Claire has started to leave toys on my belly to "play with the baby." I'd say we're both beyond ready for her to come out and join us in the real world.

Spiders, an obvious choice for an infant

As I sit here on the couch, about to go make dinner (creamy chicken noodle soup and a giant loaf of ciabatta bread, and probably some sliced cheese because cheese goes with everything), staring at my packed bags and the pile of wrapped Christmas presents (my parents are going to drive them back to the lake house since we'll be there for the holidays), I am so glad tomorrow is D-Day because there is literally NOTHING left for me to do. I scrubbed all of our exterior windows and reorganized the kids' playroom bins for goodness sakes. I finished Landon's photo book last night and Claire's arrived in time for wrapping a few days ago. I am ready x 1,000,000. Maybe not ready for an actual baby- as we lay in bed last night JP and I both looked over at the cozy little co-sleeper set up in the corner of the room and discussed how completely insane we were to go back to fractured sleep and nighttime feedings and maybe, just maybe this was all a huge mistake. But we're here and it's happening and when it's not nighttime, we're both quite thrilled at the idea of welcoming a third baby into the fold. Mostly because that baby is going to grow into a toddler who's going to grow into a kid and it's the trio of freewheeling kidlets we're particularly excited to watch grow and play and to drive around the country to climb mountains and other piles of rocks. All in all, it promises to be quite an adventure.

An adventure that should be starting mid-afternoon tomorrow. My mom flies in tonight, Claire's big sister shirt is waiting on her dresser, and Landon's big brother shirt is packed in his backpack to change into after school. Just a few more hours until we meet our baby girl and I welcome wine and waist lines back into my life (maybe not all at once) and say goodbye to the giant belly I'm currently typing over/around. At this point, it really can't come soon enough- till tomorrow everyone!

Feathering the Nest

Yesterday was my last day of work until February! Monday happens to be a federal holiday, so I get a free home day before we head to the hospital on Tuesday morning. My c-section is scheduled for noon (now 1:30 p.m.), so we'll drop off the kids at school together and get to L&D by 11:30 a.m. It's all so weirdly convenient. My mom flies in late Monday night, so she'll be here to stay with the kids while JP stays with me and our new baby girl. We can't wait! Claire has her big sister shirt all ready to go for its Tuesday unveiling. On the ride home from school yesterday when we did our habitual updated count down of days left until baby sister is "coming out" and only got to four, she finally acknowledged, "that's not very many days mommy!!" After weeks of annoyance that this process was taking so damn long, she finally sees the light at the end of the tunnel (as does her mama).

Last day outfit; a re-wear of Monday's dress made new with tights and a different scarf

At my final check-up on Thursday, the CNM was prodding around my belly trying to get a good signal on the heart rate monitor (baby girl is completely posterior, so she can be hard to read) and said, "Do you have big babies? ... Because this one ... this one is not going to be small." Made me laugh. Landon was 7 lbs. 7 oz. at 35 weeks and Claire was 8 lbs. 10 oz. at 39 weeks, so I think those likely qualify as "not small." It will be fun to see where baby 3 ends up, and I have a variety of hospital outfits for her, whatever her girth. (I still remember the surprise when the nurse told us we could change Claire's clothes in the hospital- we were still adjusting to the concept of having her sleep in the room with us and not having to ask permission to pick her up, it never even occurred to us we were "allowed" to change her!)

We have everything in the house as set as it can be. The nursery and its drawers of tiny clothes are ready, the swing is set up in our TV room, the high chair is waiting in the corner of the dining room, the car seat bases are in the cars (though not yet installed; I'm refusing to face the reality that all 3 car seats might not fit in the back of my car, so I'm just not trying them yet), and I've cleared out a shelf in the kitchen for bottles and the tiny plastic cups and things that will follow. It's weird going back to all the baby stuff. Claire has been potty trained for over a year and has eaten with normal cups, dishes, and utensils for even longer than that, so this feels like a throwback to a bygone era we've mostly forgotten about.

And for lack of a better place to put them, here's updated pictures of the home decor I've been working on for the last 3-4 months. With last week's addition of the side tables I found for $40/each at Target last week, I'd say we're done! When JP lost his job last fall we stopped spending any money on house stuff (or anything unnecessary), so I sat and plotted and window shopped for months until finally this summer the swim school made a little bit of purchasing possible. Marshall's, TJ Maxx, Ross, and HomeGoods all made their way back into my life and I carefully started adding finishing touches. I'm so happy with the house right now. I hope to someday knock out and redo our kitchen, but even without that, sometimes I just walk around and think about how much I love it. I love that it's 70 years old, love that it's not in the suburbs, love that it's different and not some cookie cutter McMansion on a too small lot (this is Texas after all). I adore our old neighborhood and its giant trees. I think and hope that this will be "home" for a long time.

Updated Living Room:

 

 

 

These pictures were taken before I found the side tables and the thought of getting up and taking new pictures seems so hard, so here's an iPhone shot from a weird angle instead. I love them! And I love the $40 clearance price tag!

 

The Playroom; one of my favorite parts of our house. It's so bright and cheery and a perfect blend of contained and open:

 

The room we still don't have a consistent name for (often family room, sometimes TV room, maybe a den?), but I love it. I love having the TV tucked away from the main areas (we're not big TV people, particularly during the day; it's more of an after the kids go to bed thing) and I love the separateness for JP and my hanging out in the evenings. It's a cozy space with big windows and 3 doors that can completely close it off from the rest of the house.

 

 

There's now a small side table and recliner added to the side of the love seat, but again, new pictures are hard.

 

And the biggest change- The Dining Room! We used this space as a play room for the first year in the house, but when my parents gifted us with a dining table we made the big switch. It's right next to the kitchen and has been outfitted with an outdoor rug leftover from the Target summer sale and the best of the clearance section from Garden Ridge.

 

 

 

 

I love picturing our family of five growing bigger and sitting around it every night for dinner.

Now time to pack a hospital back and plan a week of dinners I won't be here to eat because I'll be in the hospital snuggling a tiny/"not-small" baby dressed in cozy sleepers- can't wait!!