Saturday, January 9, 2021

9 Days In

So, 2021. I didn't have particularly high hopes for you, but I didn't expect a family health crisis or our narcisstic psychopath of a president to whip up a seditious mob to break windows, storm the Capitol Building, and desecrate the seat of our democracy on Day 6.
Like, what in the actual fuck was that? Besides a thing that's been steadily and obviously escalating for four years, fanned by the president and his right wing media and ignored by the only party who could do anything to stop it. Five people died (one more than died in Benghazi, by the way, so I'm sure Republicans will want months of hearings to get to the bottom of things- except no, they've already said we should all move on) because our president is STILL throwing a temper tantrum because more than half the country wanted a president who won't make fraud and treason and violating the constitutional a daily part of life. Weird, but those things seemed to matter to 7 million more of us. Oh and one of my senators was helping lead the fake objections to our free and fair election and then fundraising off the plans because he's a crass opportunist and the literal worst. [head explodes]

So there's that.

Adding to it, I was driving 85 mph heading east on I-35 as my phone started blowing up that the pro-Trump mob had broken into the Capitol Building and I deeply regretted canceling Sirius satellite radio as I frantically scanned through local channels to find the news, calling both my mom and James to get them to read me headlines from the computer and TV.
I was driving east at 85 mph because my grandmother suffered a stroke on New Year's Eve. My dad's mother, JoAnne Lorraine of Montana, 88 years old (89 this Thursday), married to my Grandpa Jim for 68 years just last week.
Her details are her own, but it's been days of diagnoses and prognoses, steps forward and steps back, uncertainty then clarity then uncertainty again. It's been a stark reminder of how incredibly lucky I am to have four living grandparents and at 89, 90, 90, and 91, that isn't anything I can take for granted.
My very pregnant sister (32 weeks!) was cleared by her OB to fly in to San Antonio, and since we had to keep our spouses at home to care for the children, we decided to be each other's partners for the visit. I got my negative Covid test Tuesday afternoon and drove over on Wednesday, picking up my sister from the airport and meeting my other set of grandparents before driving to the hospital to see my very tired and very frail Grandma Jo.
We got to take turns sitting with her, holding her hand, showing her pictures, FaceTiming with the great-grandkids.
I'm back now- my grandpa, parents, and aunt and uncle are taking turns being with her. It's very hard, but I'm very glad that whatever the next days or hopefully weeks and months bring, we were able to see her and hold her hand and let her know we were there.

a visit in 2019

I got back to a full work inbox and hour 35 of a headache that started brewing before I left. I got to test James's headache kit that he gave me for Christmas and I must say, these cooling patches were pretty amazing.
Just cold enough for some relief, but not so cold it's uncomfortable. I went through two, plus a cup of my Tension Tamer tea. I'm not sure if it was either of those things, or the "1 Extra Strength Tylenol + 2 Ibuprofen" combo my doctor recommended, or just being home with my people (or, most likely, a combination of all three), but my headache did fade in time for me to join the kids for a few more rounds of cards before bed.
It's good to be home. Work is busy, the kids are back in school, and I continue to be distracted by both the national news and my family news in San Antonio. So one day at a time, I guess. It's actually Day 79 for me and I've never been so thankful for my personal ban because I think without it I would be drinking a LOT of wine right now. But here's some food instead:

Sat: Stromboli! (this was amazing! Highly recommend.)
Sun: Hearty Chicken Bake (I double the veggies and use a rotisserie chicken).
Mon: Summer Soup (I use the crockpot and a bag of frozen mixed veggies), bread.
Tues: Beef Enchiladas, Rice.
Wed: Thai Drunken Noodles, TJ's frozen pot stickers.
Thurs: Mexican Rice, all the toppings.
Fri: Pizza (finally making that Detroit style pizza I've been promising myself for two weeks!)


  1. Sending well wishes to your grandmother. It must have meant so much to her for you and your sister to be able to be by her side for a while.

    And yes, the mob at the capitol (incited by our own president!!! WTF but also who is not surprised? is this not what we marched against in January 2017???) was a horrifying way to start 2021. It's so much to process. Thankful for virtual counseling appointments.

    We have been enjoying Seedlip, a non-alcoholic "spirit" over here.

  2. I'm really glad you were able to be with your grandmother. Thinking of you and your family.

  3. This has been a tough week for my family as well.

    My brother is a LEO in DC so last week had an added layer of worry for our family, but he is in the Park Police (federal officers that have jurisdiction on all federal park land, which includes a lot of DC). There are a lot of valid questions about why they weren't called in to help. While I'm grateful he remained safe, it is a stark contrast to other mass gatherings over the last year. The next few weeks will continue to be difficult as I read there are ongoing threats of violence to disrupt the transition and against any LEO that stands in their way.

    Also last week, my father's dear friend passed from Covid. Just over 4 weeks ago they were playing golf. Thankfully, my dad and their other golf buddies did not catch it but it is so sad. His friend spent about 3 weeks in ICU on a ventilator, not being able to spend time with his wife or their kids/grandkids. He was a healthy man in his 60's.

    I am 45 and I have lost all my grandparents, one long before I was born and the other 3 have all been gone since I was about 30. I am always happy when you write about your grandparents and the gratitude you have for them. It is obvious that you cherish them.

    My thoughts are with your grandmother and family.

  4. So sorry to hear about your grandmother (especially amidst all the other terrible world events). We lost my grandmother(in-law, technically) in the fall and being able to spend the time with her at the end was such a gift. Grandparents are so, so special and I am sending all the best wishes for her recovery and your family.