tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post799227394653156478..comments2024-03-28T22:49:03.563-05:00Comments on Lag Liv: in the middle of the nightLLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04431706155081017734noreply@blogger.comBlogger25125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-51869372488847199352013-01-11T19:42:19.596-06:002013-01-11T19:42:19.596-06:00I am so sorry. I said a prayer for you guys. I rea...I am so sorry. I said a prayer for you guys. I really hope he finds something soon. :(<br /><br />Sending good thoughts your way. I'm also addicted to West Wing right now, but by the end of the post that seemed a lot less important. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04527340723835063533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-57852538394614199852013-01-10T21:19:21.377-06:002013-01-10T21:19:21.377-06:00Ugh. This really sucks. I just wish there was a li...Ugh. This really sucks. I just wish there was a light at the end of the tunnel. Like "oh if I can just get through 6 more months of being broke I'll find this great job and it'll be a distant memory"... but at least for me, there isn't. I can't even bring myself to blog about it because it's just so damned depressing and I don't want to be the person who always has some bitching and moaning to do. <br />The positive is that JP is lucky he has you to just be there. And that he's not alone. The dad of the people I babysit for god laid off last week. It's happening to all sorts of people it shouldn't be happening to. It's shitty to be in good company with something like this, but he's in good company. Halliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00213593870039027367noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-12549755485343802422013-01-10T18:46:24.994-06:002013-01-10T18:46:24.994-06:00Seeing your partner feel so disempowered as a pers...Seeing your partner feel so disempowered as a person and a co-provider for lack of employment is one of the most heart-wrenching feelings I've known. My husband works freelance and his "slow times" have been some of the hardest on our marriage. I always try to stay positive and be supportive without being smothering but also not too flip and all the while trying not to overvocalize my own worries about our finances, our future, where we are going to live, what will it mean for my career if we have to make a major choice (and how it makes me, the planner, freak the FREAK out)... blah blah blah in a circle and around again. I've been there, and it's horrible and I wish you strength to get through this time.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-63179493605606605102013-01-10T10:16:04.673-06:002013-01-10T10:16:04.673-06:00LL, my uncle owns an oil/investment co in Houston....LL, my uncle owns an oil/investment co in Houston. Is that too far away? I can ask him... (I don't know you at all, or JP or his expertise, but I love your blog and feel for your family). -simi.hoque@gmail.comSimi Hoquenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-56495495500445789172013-01-10T08:40:30.859-06:002013-01-10T08:40:30.859-06:00Delurking to say how much this post spoke to me. A...Delurking to say how much this post spoke to me. Although the situations are reversed (I am the wife/nearly lawyer, husband is employed, but not where he wants to be) I am just coming to the same conclusions. I have moments of overwhelming gratitude that we are happy and healthy and all that jazz, and moments of - ugh neither of us are where we want to be 10 years out (of high school for us). And while I want to talk every fear and insecurity to death, husband would much prefer to shrink into his own head. And although money is of course the scariest, realest issue, it's all those other "why am i not good enough" thoughts that really make you crazy. Wow - all that to say I know exactly how you feel (although of course you expressed it so much better than I ever could) and thank you for writing this. I really needed this, today especially. - RebeccaAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-34022817386288151632013-01-10T08:33:24.254-06:002013-01-10T08:33:24.254-06:00I'm sorry, money stuff is the worst because it...I'm sorry, money stuff is the worst because its tied to every other thing in your life. Here's hoping for something wonderful for him soon. <br /><br />Has he considered taking on swim lessons in the meantime? Is that even an option? Meegshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09218498742250493159noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-1421690078340748792013-01-10T00:29:50.723-06:002013-01-10T00:29:50.723-06:00Ll, "graduated from college." I know you...Ll, "graduated from college." I know you love grammar. I really admire the honesty of this post. You guys are so strong and will get through. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-49161170370025869832013-01-09T21:58:12.566-06:002013-01-09T21:58:12.566-06:00LL, Sorry it's so hard; I'll be sending go...LL, Sorry it's so hard; I'll be sending good energy your way and wishing the best for you. Unemployment is unfair to everyone, yet every time you write about this I feel extra outraged that it should happen to such a wonderful partner and parent as JP.maya https://www.blogger.com/profile/11164383180083433329noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-7239358377512406882013-01-09T19:22:20.883-06:002013-01-09T19:22:20.883-06:00The economy stinks! So many good men are out of w...The economy stinks! So many good men are out of work. The job market is brutal for so many very qualified people. As a 26 year survivor of the corporate jungle.... I offer this piece of advice to your good looking husband-- reconsider the facial hair. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-89985901170981938362013-01-09T16:04:41.797-06:002013-01-09T16:04:41.797-06:00I've been in JP's spot (for 13 of the wors...I've been in JP's spot (for 13 of the worst months of my life), and it sucks. There is nothing, unfortunately, that you can say or do to lessen the pain and self-loathing that comes with being unemployed. He knows, deep down, that it'll be ok. But getting hit in the face with it day after day takes it's toll. You and JP are both in my thoughts. I hope he finds something soon.Denorahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00192830024562634469noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-64017896802470480932013-01-09T15:40:25.182-06:002013-01-09T15:40:25.182-06:00Not for the same reasons perhaps but I think many ...Not for the same reasons perhaps but I think many of us are up at night. Try the long lens if you can. Hugs.<br />DesimomAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-48457188155035369542013-01-09T14:31:26.768-06:002013-01-09T14:31:26.768-06:00This is so hard. Six years ago, I was unemployed ...This is so hard. Six years ago, I was unemployed after five years in a job. It took six months to find a job and through that time I kept wondering if I would ever work again. And, of course, when one offer came, so did another. <br />Those six months were a horrible time for me. And, it was a lot longer than ten years out of school. I had been out, and employed, for almost twenty years. I doubted everything. My career, my choices, my viability in the market place.<br />I have children about your age, and I remind them that they came into the work force at one of the worst times in our history. Life will not always be like this. And, as the economy improves, you will be in a position of having proven experience and skills. It will be okay. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-45617910707366157602013-01-09T14:21:17.972-06:002013-01-09T14:21:17.972-06:00Sending hugs. I admire how well you are handling t...Sending hugs. I admire how well you are handling this difficult situation.Hilaryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05951962305356305038noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-16598323434021008462013-01-09T10:48:54.286-06:002013-01-09T10:48:54.286-06:00Sending lots of hugs and good vibes. My hubby was...Sending lots of hugs and good vibes. My hubby was not only unwillingly unemployed but not eligible for unemployment benefits (for almost 2 years!) And I was in an industry that was downsizing--so I was in constant fear of losing my job as well. I honestly don't know how we made it.<br /><br />It was so hard watching hubby sink into depression as he took every rejection personally--even though I tried my best to help him see that it was not personal. It was also hard to suffer financially--while we watched so many others "living it up"--shopping, going out to eat, vacations, etc. It was a very humbling experience, and I became so much more grateful for the things you have mentioned: good health, delightful kids, my job, and that we were somehow surviving this.<br /><br />He's been working for almost 6 months now--at a place that he likes and that likes him (at a pretty substantial cut in pay--but hey it's more than he was making for almost 2 years!!)<br /><br />Best wishes as you go through this.Kay Deehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06305122028766122015noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-22042587100821931132013-01-09T10:41:36.277-06:002013-01-09T10:41:36.277-06:00I'm sorry you guys are going through this...it...I'm sorry you guys are going through this...it's so miserable, both to be someone job searching, and being with someone who feels terrible because they're job searching and haven't got anything yet, and you can't make them feel better. I'm sure JP will get something amazing, but I realize that job hunting right now is just awful and there's not really anything you can do about that. Anyway, I also wanted to say, beautiful post. New Kid on the Hallwayhttp://newkidonthehallway.typepad.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-35845366812155950512013-01-09T09:57:21.522-06:002013-01-09T09:57:21.522-06:00I feel for you both....back in early December my D...I feel for you both....back in early December my DH lost his job after spending 5 years in pharmaceutical sales with the same big time company. It was a complete shock, totally unexpected. We were able to temporarily ignore the looming issue with the holidays fast approaching and just enjoyed the fact that the kids were home from the sitters more and got to spend lots of time with daddy. Now the holidays are over...the new year has started...and we both wonder what's next every single minute of the day. My DH graduated with his BS and BA in Dec 2005...has had two jobs, got married, bought a house, bought land, completely remodeled and added onto the house, had two kids, and the list goes on. We, too, have been thinking a lot about the ''10 years since college'' fact A LOT! Me more so than him since I graduated in Fall 2003 and am technically closer to ten years than him.<br /><br />Bottom line is you all are not alone. Crunching numbers that have never needed to be 'crunched' before, calculating the cost of living per month just to pay the basic bills, limiting credit card use, endless job applications, spending more time at home and less time out spending money, less/no eating out....we are in the EXACT same boat! We feel for you guys! <br /><br />Best Wishes!<br />Teresa -ILAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-45075390159811845122013-01-09T09:19:51.346-06:002013-01-09T09:19:51.346-06:00So sorry LL! I can tell that both you and JP are s...So sorry LL! I can tell that both you and JP are strong and very Lucky to have each other!CPhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09049860284871030328noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-70238193247370162272013-01-09T08:10:07.826-06:002013-01-09T08:10:07.826-06:00We're here for you so post away. Get all the h...We're here for you so post away. Get all the heartache out on paper so you can continue being strong for your family. You're doing AMAZINGLY well. I'm so impressed by you. Will be praying for JP. Every week in church our congregation prays for the unemployed and underemployed -- now I know whose name to attach to that prayer in my heart. Leehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17335404463349950566noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-79221823532248634782013-01-09T07:03:28.611-06:002013-01-09T07:03:28.611-06:00When my husband was laid off I had all those same ...When my husband was laid off I had all those same thoughts. It is hard, it is so hard. Not that this helps, but he ultimately took a job he hated for a few months and than landed a job he loves. It came with a pay cut but we are making it.<br /><br />I know this doesn't help, but it will be okay. This right now, sucks. It does, it sucks, so, so much.jodifurhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02436403330073542241noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-10234232714853694502013-01-09T06:44:18.932-06:002013-01-09T06:44:18.932-06:00Your transparency and ability to communicate the f...Your transparency and ability to communicate the feelings of the situation are a gift. I am glad that writing is your swimming. Unwillingly unemployed is a challenge for everyone involved. Wishing you sleep and headache free days!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05079391844992252341noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-67403486517078454292013-01-09T04:55:07.245-06:002013-01-09T04:55:07.245-06:00Also praying for both of you, LL.
virtual hugsAlso praying for both of you, LL.<br />virtual hugsButterflyfishhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10107438909973957940noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-10802709381401104152013-01-09T02:03:31.713-06:002013-01-09T02:03:31.713-06:00What Izzie said-- I'm there too, and mine has ...What Izzie said-- I'm there too, and mine has been nearly-- eek, I won't write that because it will make both of us feel worse. I am ready to work, I am flexible, I am experienced,,,,and as I wait and keep applying and sending lengthy apps down that dark hole, I get older and the ads become, even more frequently, for the "1-5 year attorney" and I am "too experienced" even though they know that doesn't mean "too expensive."<br /><br />I agree that a foul mood makes the whole family feel foul, so the mood-holder tends to withhold. I do blame myself for making an ill-timed career change in 2007, getting caught in the recession, jeopardizing everyone else's plans, and digging us deeper in debt.<br /><br />What a cheery subject for midnight! Hugs to you, girl.Lisa M.https://www.blogger.com/profile/15845077916232158514noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-74042984568285198052013-01-09T01:51:21.885-06:002013-01-09T01:51:21.885-06:00As someone who is unwillingly unemployed, I can sa...As someone who is unwillingly unemployed, I can say that there isn't much you can do. It's just the beating up that we seem to do to ourselves even when we know our significant other still loves us and knows that we're doing all that we can to get working. It's also a large part to do with how terrible the job application process is, especially now. Getting some feedback and info and not just in a job application status limbo might be a small win. I just know that the highs and lows will eventually end up in a job, even on those days when it feels like I'll never get employed. If anyone has any ideas about how to stop feeling so sh*tty about it from the unemployed or spouse of the unemployed I'd love to hear it! Izziehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16771625349447504361noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-55285915987035828742013-01-08T23:30:00.220-06:002013-01-08T23:30:00.220-06:00Know that someone is praying ...... for both of yo...Know that someone is praying ...... for both of you.<br />xoxoJaninehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00949809367923657970noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-30551026350141780022013-01-08T23:12:30.815-06:002013-01-08T23:12:30.815-06:00LL, I'm so sorry. Fwiw, my DH has a good job ...LL, I'm so sorry. Fwiw, my DH has a good job but I still have middle of the night anxiety about it. Somehow, since it's him and not me, it makes me more anxious than my own career. Part of it is, I think, the lawyer's personality of always worrying. I know he's worried too, but maybe try not to project? Has his MBA school career services helped at all? Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com