tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post5005590027293542146..comments2024-03-28T22:49:03.563-05:00Comments on Lag Liv: SnippetsLLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04431706155081017734noreply@blogger.comBlogger14125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-28522289333711639052013-02-11T16:50:54.238-06:002013-02-11T16:50:54.238-06:00Just read "Again the Magic" on your reco...Just read "Again the Magic" on your recommendation, and loved it, thanks! I've been reading the wallflower books in Spanish translations to practice and highly recommend it, if you have ever studied Spanish ro another language. It allows me to feel like I am learning while still reading escapist fluff reading. Plus, it makes the reading go a bit slower, which makes the books last longer. <br /><br />Good luck to JP. It sounds like you are doing a great job supporting him through this rough patch, and I hope it is over soon!<br />-SarahAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-23001455454274778472013-02-03T12:15:34.719-06:002013-02-03T12:15:34.719-06:00Tried your mom's verm salad yesterday and it w...Tried your mom's verm salad yesterday and it was awesome. Thanks for the recipe. Now the Mexican cheesecake AND verm salad are in the family cookbook!<br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-21979179615452226632013-02-01T19:52:59.178-06:002013-02-01T19:52:59.178-06:00I too was let go from a large corporation located ...I too was let go from a large corporation located in Austin on September 5 (what a coincidence!) after almost 24 years of service. I can relate to JP and the "what am I going to do?" question. It really haunted me for several months until I decided to take my husband's advice and "do what you really want to do and like". I do feel fortunate to have his support and I am sure JP feels that way about you although he may not be able to show it all the time. Once I started really exploring my interests I decided to get my real estate license. The course has given me a real lift as I am learning new things that I am truly interested in. IT was never that interesting to me and I am thankful I was finally set free from that and the corporate crap that only seems to get worse and worse as time goes by. I have just passed my first exam with a mark of 100%! Things always do work out in the end and everything happens for a reason - we don't always know at the time but it has prove true since my mother told me this many, many years ago. I don't even know exactly what I want to do with real estate yet but there are many opportunities to consider once I am licensed. I just wanted to say that I have walked JP's path and you are doing all the right things in helping and supporting him. We are celebrating our 25th anniversary this year and I can tell you that we went through some pretty tough times through the years but getting through those times together made stronger and closer. It will all work out but not knowing how or when is hard I understand.<br /><br />Hang in there.<br /><br />KimAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-11320779660045631152013-02-01T14:08:14.817-06:002013-02-01T14:08:14.817-06:00LL: what do you think of the swim school idea? Do...LL: what do you think of the swim school idea? Do you think JP will be happy would be happy doing that (if not for the lack of immediate $$$-remuneration)? It is so, so hard to find a job/career that you really enjoy and find satisfaction in. And, of course there's risk there, but there is also something really awesome about having your own business and not being at the mercy of "corporate decision-making" (for lack of a better term). I like JP so much from your description of him and with his passion, energy & smarts, I'm sure the swim school would be a success.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-6617581933936265402013-02-01T13:45:06.812-06:002013-02-01T13:45:06.812-06:00I wish I had advice for you on the job thing, but ...I wish I had advice for you on the job thing, but it's good that the swim school thing came up! Good for you on the budgeting. I really REALLY need to do that. I spend way too much money and have no savings, but I also have no discipline (other than never using Credit Cards).LAnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-38539325218369426572013-02-01T08:27:07.555-06:002013-02-01T08:27:07.555-06:00Maybe he could look at the school as something ...Maybe he could look at the school as something 'temporary'- not that it has to be if it turns out he loves it, but...knowing that he's not locked in may make it easier to commit for the short term while he's still figuring out what path he wants to be on long-term.Nancy Rhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12772373803915294292noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-62775784006309059962013-02-01T08:23:57.209-06:002013-02-01T08:23:57.209-06:00My husband was the straight A, valedictorian, perf...My husband was the straight A, valedictorian, perfect SAT score, over involved in extracurricular high school and college student. He was always told he was smart and could do "anything" and he's found it very difficult to define what that is and even when he does to deal with the real world reality of the job market in which the "best" or "smartest" person doesn't necessarily succeed. It's been really rough on him so I can relate. I wish after this time I had a solution to how to make him feel like his self image is not tied up with career success, but I don't - I know only that being there for him and encouraging him even when it's hard is about the only thing that seems to make him feel better about things for a little while. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-5526828001055813852013-01-31T20:13:35.916-06:002013-01-31T20:13:35.916-06:00My husband and I spent two years retooling our liv...My husband and I spent two years retooling our lives. It took him at least a year to finally embrace the idea that his paycheck and job title were not the equivalent of him as a person, but rather someone else's idea of who he was. If that makes sense! I think men, in particular, identify a little too closely with a paycheck and job title for self worth and a sense of purpose. I also had times where I just didn't want to talk to him because it hurt so much to hear the hurt in his voice. Change is really hard, but we all come out on the other side of it sooner or later. We ended up moving our family from Washington state to San Antonio for new jobs and a new start. It's all working out!<br /><br />And it will all work out for you guys, too!Elisabethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00285374251982452851noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-72006464077083855252013-01-31T10:34:14.502-06:002013-01-31T10:34:14.502-06:00I was getting ready to ask for more book recommend...I was getting ready to ask for more book recommendations. My mother suprised me with a kindle for Christmas and OHMYGOD!!! I have never been so happy with a present! My husband has been fussing at me because before the kindle I had kept my reading at a normal level. Now, he comes home and if I'm reading he can have a whole conversation with me and at the end, I look up and go, "Huh? Did you say something? Wait, when did you get here??" <br /><br />After a few all-nighters to finish a series (I should know better than to start a series on a weekday), he finally sent me an e-card that says, "I sometimes pretend to myself that I have insomnia. When what I really have is a good book and inadequate respect for tomorrow."<br /><br />Now, I'm off to buy more books for my kindle. I've been so proud of myself. I've had it for a month and of the 27 books I've "purchased" I only had to pay for 6 of them - and they were in the 99 cent range. Of course, this means I've been reading a lot historical romance crap, but it feeds the habit.Melissanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-76060178620594387412013-01-31T10:16:49.172-06:002013-01-31T10:16:49.172-06:00I'm so sorry you're going through this ext...I'm so sorry you're going through this extended tough time. <br /><br />I love that the kids had talked about the puppy shirt, and they both got so excited that Claire had the opportunity to wear it. So cute. I'm looking forward to my boys actually being able to talk to each other!CMhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01559451322234777335noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-88940481753538292182013-01-31T09:04:51.049-06:002013-01-31T09:04:51.049-06:00I think for JP, swimming is his joy. Which is why,...I think for JP, swimming is his joy. Which is why, every time he says he should quit masters and save the monthly fee, he is met with absolute refusal on my end. We will sell our house and all my shoes before I allow that to happen. For the other little things- a lunch date, a movie, etc- we do them, but in a lot of ways they make him feel worse afterward. He hates (HATES) that he is not contributing financially, no matter how much I try to remind him that he is contributing in every other way and the kids have no idea who makes what and just know that they get picked up first at school by a daddy who plays with them all afternoon, but the paycheck issue is a much bigger part of his perceived self-worth than I ever realized. <br /><br />I think, this time, it's all just deeper. It's the natural realization that hey, maybe I won't be a millionaire by age 30 like business school led me to believe, while also being genuinely uncertain of what he wants his path to be, while also currently feeling like he's not on any path at all. And though he enjoys all the fun things we do (because we do still do them- we're just not buying much and unlike me, there's nothing he seems to even want to buy), the sadness is always there underneath and it's painful to know that whatever we're doing, a part of his mind is running on an endless loop of "what am I going to do? What if I can't find anything to do? What do I even want to do?" <br /><br />Luckily, opportunities seem like they're starting to emerge, so I'm hopeful this is the low point. It's just really low. LLhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04431706155081017734noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-39154813299742441902013-01-31T08:39:16.260-06:002013-01-31T08:39:16.260-06:00I hardly ever comment but have read you for years,...I hardly ever comment but have read you for years, since Chicago. Just wanted to chime in and second what RJ said about JP needing a shot of joyfulness. I was unemployed for 6 months in 2012 and it is just emotionally debilitating, and it's really really hard to keep your "chin up." I really really appreciated when my husband let our budget go, so I could do something special, even if it was just a movie. <br /><br />Anyways, I hope that the swim school works out and helps lift JP's spirits. I remember how disappointed you guys where when it didn't happen before. Alimshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02890652961440157339noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-60951985800178814792013-01-31T07:57:30.639-06:002013-01-31T07:57:30.639-06:00The "puppy shirt" just about killed me. ...The "puppy shirt" just about killed me. SO much love for these kids I've never met!mayahttp://www.pocobrat.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3552008288188142238.post-43675039618541683912013-01-31T03:40:58.055-06:002013-01-31T03:40:58.055-06:00I can relate to the overwhelm - I've read ever...I can relate to the overwhelm - I've read every Julia Quinn Kindle has to offer, along with the (published today) Arm Candy - Celebity Escort!<br /><br />It sounds like JP may be in need of a shot of joyfulness and playfulness, or being part of a team of buddies rather than going it solo - whatever feeds his Mojo.<br /><br />I know from what you've written that he's the last person to ask for money to be spent on things for him - but perhaps it might be worth giving yourself two weeks less grace with the mortgage if there's something that lets him be the old JP - whatever that might be - a Masters swim meet, or a seminar on something - on business planning, or sports physiology or something or a trip to hang out with a friend (it sounds like he might be quite isolated what with no family, and having lost a close friend with the last swim school) <br /><br />I know for myself, when I get down, and depressed, unable to reach out - the being my old self comes around when I go dancing, or have to give a speech (Toastmasters helped me - being with people in a quasi business situation, and having to speak up, think on my feet, make presentations - that helped, and because I was unemployed I had the free time to make quick progress). <br /><br />Even though those things cost money, they were worth it to help break out of a funk. <br /><br />Anyway - none of this might work for you, but good luck with it all! And it sounds like Claire has inherited her parents swimming competitiveness and tenacity!RJnoreply@blogger.com